««- · CWU MEMOiRS 0x47 · -»»
========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x47 =========
DaTE: 1995-09-16 aT aBoUT 14:00
LoCATi0N: mR.mEgAsTuFf's =>REAL<= rOOm (YEAHH!!), hAutATAipALE, FinLAND
PrESeNT: mR.mEgAsTuFf / CWU
dArK sTuFfEr / CWU
WaRe FuCKeR / CWU
JUICE / CWU
- - -
aLSO adULTZ: OH7MO, TERTTU, RITU
+ sOME FUKKEN LAMeRZ iN mTV3 tEKSTiKANAVA!!!===========================================================================
JUiCE: Man, ye've gotten back here in Lahnala!! Couldna have believed that aboot Reijo!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, Syphilis-Dick has given up 'bout a lot lately. Guess he's now afraid of us for real and ain't goin' well with Ritu either anymore.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Guess Ritu got Syphie convinced that I should be allowed to be here every now and then, at least on my own fuckin' birthday!!
WaRe FuCKeR: What've ye been wishin' for birthday present??
JUiCE: Guess that might be linked to them Tele fellas who were seen aroond Lahnala lately...
WaRe FuCKeR: Oh, to who?
JUiCE: Man, ye never notice nuffin' even when there's stuff goin' on in front of yer nose!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, I s'pose Terttu had been gossiping 'bout that...
WaRe FuCKeR: I ain't managed to follow nuffin' 'cause I've just been in Frontline!!
JUiCE: Yeah, should've guesed that once ye get a straight link to Frontline yer gonna spend all yer free time there and never notice nuffin' else!
dArK sTuFfEr: That has really eaten up a lot of time, really...
WaRe FuCKeR: But I mean what's happened now there, tell me already PLEEZE PLEEZE tell it!??
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, ya could guess that from da Tele guys...
WaRe FuCKeR: HAVE YE GOTTEN A NODE OF YER OWN HERE???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Finally ya got it.
WaRe FuCKeR: WOWWOW! ARE YE NOW GONNA PUT UP A BOARD HERE???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, it's now officially in my use since today, as I'm turning fourteen today.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: PCBoard has already been conf'ed, and da board's gonna be called Slaughterhouse 3000...
dArK sTuFfEr: Ain't that a bit too similar name as Warehouse 2000?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: That was made up by me to begin with, who cares! And besides Tim already brought that Warehouse down!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Well, maybe that's okey then.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Or actually Tim got tired 'bout it ages ago, and it was mostly runnin' without maintenance in early summer already.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: He managed to keep it in his corner even without interest, 'cause that fuckin' Reijo bought him a separate computer so it didn't disturb his games or anythig!!
JUiCE: They've got some real yuppie thangs there, yeah...
WaRe FuCKeR: Have ye tried out that node already?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, we only carried my machine here this morning. And it's anyway better to open da line with proper ceremonics after eatin' da cake...
WaRe FuCKeR: So unfair that only then!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya can wait for that short time...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And I'm also gonna get the copper wire here, so then there's four houses connected to 2.0! Hönttölä, Koivikko, Eskonaho and now this Lahnala.
WaRe FuCKeR: Yeah, so cool when new regulars come into the groupchat!! I've been sometimes bored when I've been the only chatter online...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, maybe I don't have da strength to hang around with ya every evening, so ye should really have sumthing else to do too...
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, it'd be so different if we got a similar fixed connection to like the Internet, or even the plain IRC would suit very well...
JUiCE: Well, could be quite hard with that, unless yer some company owner like that there TF.
dArK sTuFfEr: Some university student apartments also have a fixed Internet connection...
JUiCE: Oh, yeah, right.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Guess they're gonna soon be available even quite cheaply in Helsinki, there's already quite many boards with fixed net.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: But don't expect these backwaters to get 'em in this millennium!! Luckily I'm gonna get outta here once da junior high is over...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: If ya wanna have something like 24H IRC here in da backwoods yar forced to look at some fuckin' MTV3 TELETEXT CHANNEL, bwahahah!!!
WaRe FuCKeR: Ye could get so easily bored aboot that, 'cause it's some pages rollin' all the time and nobody can even chat there!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: How d'ya mean not? There's some clowns there already usin' it a kind of chat or message area 'coz they don't know 'bout any better...
WaRe FuCKeR: I mean whatt hell, is there some kind of chat system there now!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Man, ya've again missed everything!
WaRe FuCKeR: Guess ye ain't got teletext in yer own TV...?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Right, nope...
WaRe FuCKeR: Pleeze pleeze can we get downstairs and look at it there pleeze pleeze??
mR.mEgAsTuFf: WE FUCKIN' WON'T! I CAN'T STAND SO LAME PEOPLE ON MY OWN BIRTHDAY!!!
JUiCE: I guess Ritu's car came to the yard now, so we could get downstairs in any case...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, let's go there. Ritu was in the town gettin' that cake from the Jauhiainens...
JUiCE: It seems Terttu and Osmo are also with.
dArK sTuFfEr: Fuckin' Terttu...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Just be careful 'bout talkings 'coz Terttu will pass da gossips forward... especially if they're related to Reijo then SHUT UP!
WaRe FuCKeR: Okay, right...
...
RITU: I'm gonna fizzle up some coffee and put the cakes and cookies ready in the table...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Okay then.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Hey Warie, where are ya goin'?
WaRe FuCKeR: I'm just havin' a quick glance at that Teletext thingie first!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, if ya want it so terrible much, then be my guest...
TERTTU: What program is there on at this hour?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: There ain't no program, but he just wants to see what's it like on that MTV3 teletext lameplace...
TERTTU: This old hag ain't again gettin' it at all!
WaRe FuCKeR: What page is it on here???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Go to that input page, that's da funniest to watch!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Was it now da page number 302...
WaRe FuCKeR: Three-zero-two...
WaRe FuCKeR: Yeah, 'twas that one.
WaRe FuCKeR: I MEAN WOWWW!!!
OH7MO: Is there some new thing invented for teletext?
WaRe FuCKeR: Ye can like write here by yerself!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: They've got a kinda phone numba with ten marks per minute plus da local rate...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And then ya can type some messages there on different pages with da numba keys.
OH7MO: How's that gonna happen with twelve buttons?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, look at that input page, there's a kinda two-digit code for each letter and ya can write text with 'em.
OH7MO: That may be quite slow, yeah, but maybe ye can stand it if ye just hafta get some sales announcement in...
dArK sTuFfEr: Maybe ye could get the message sendin' quite fast with a mawdem, if ye wanna save some bucks...
OH7MO: Well, it still might get quite costly, now that it's ten marks per minute!
OH7MO: And at least there's now somebody there sendin' some totally useless message.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, goddammit, "HOW OLD R U", there's some clowns there usin' that for chattin'!!
OH7MO: But what's the problem then if the city gentlemen have too much money...
WaRe FuCKeR: They ain't no gentlemen there, if ye judge from them topics!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, I think there's mostly some fuckin' teenage gals there! At least judging from that da biggest page there is some fuckin' TAKE THAT...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I don't dare to even look at that more than like a few minutes at a time before I need to take a break...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: 'CAUSE I SIMPLY CAN'T STAND IT HOW SOME PEOPLE CAN BE SO FUCKIN' LAME IMBECILES!!!
WaRe FuCKeR: Bwhahah, somebody started to backspace that text they had gotten to write!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, there's sometimes people there who notice a mistake in the text like very late and then start deletin', with da minute rate runnin'!!
OH7MO: So, usin' that mawdem autodial could save a long buck there if ye sometimes hafta send more messages there.
RITU: Here's that coffee now, and the cake is ready to get uncorked too!
TERTTU: Come to the table from there already, Kassu!
WaRe FuCKeR: Okey...
RITU: I dinna dare to put there fourteen candles, but I guess ye might not have even wanted 'em.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: No, I don't.
RITU: So, happy birthday to ye then!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, thanks.
RITU: Do take the first piece of cake.
OH7MO: It's only a year and yer even gettin' to ride yer moped on public roads!
OH7MO: But there ain't no new benefits comin' really when ye turn fourteen...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Nope...
OH7MO: But at least now yer gettin' that phoneline of yer own, and we can install da coppers like tomorrow so ye'd get into yer L.A.N. from it.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, that'd be really nice.
TERTTU: But all these modern times! I ain't seen that kind of television wonder ever afore!
TERTTU: And there's even some ordinary girl kids there usin' such a fine technical system!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, I think it's a fuckin' primitive piece of shit compared to like the boards or Internet we use...
TERTTU: So, y'all boys are usin' that there Internet also!
JUiCE: We've been usin' it since last Christmas when we got the mawdems...
TERTTU: But y'all dinna call it that back then! 'Twas only in the local newspaper where I read that yeah, right, this kind of Internet.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya couldn't tell boards or Net apart anyway, so it's all da same what we talk 'bout to ya!
OH7MO: I've heard it's becomin' a big deal, that Internet, even some ordinary folks get to try it ever more often.
RITU: Could I get to try it some day too?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya wouldn't get it anyway! Or maybe ya could just barely understand sumthing if I put in some Netscape or some other graphic multimedia crap...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: But I'M NOT FUCKIN' USIN' THAT KINDA SHIT!!!
RITU: So, what's the deal aboot 'em then?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: There ain't nuffin' interesting there!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: All da elite stuff in the Net is in da real men's text-based systems and not in such fuckin' fashionable newbie lamer turds!!!
JUiCE: But on the other hand, that Teletext is text-based too, so they could maybe learn to use sumthang like that as well?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, but 'coz there ain't nuffin' 'bout nuffin' else in those newspapers than that graphic WWW and multimedia scam!
OH7MO: It'd maybe take some time afore the ordinaries find them there IRCs and E-Mails and whatever there were...
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, or boards...
JUiCE: Hell no, boards should be kept free from folks like that!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, that'd explode my head if that kinda mongoloids found their way to boards!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Even in some fuckin' MBnet chat or da #freenet channel on IRC I always start feelin' like puke 'coz everbody's SO FUCKIN' LAME THERE!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And then there's an even lamer generation comin' in, that's fuckin' lamer than some fuckin' letters sent in da Pelit magazine!!!
OH7MO: Yeah, that might be the danger there once all the folks start usin' these here systems.
OH7MO: I mean, soon there are all the peat workers and the town drunkards...
OH7MO: That don't even have enough IQ to understand even the basics of computin'!
OH7MO: And nevertheless they get to use it once it's just made easy and automatic enough...
WaRe FuCKeR: Guess they're all not that stupid there at least?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I guess not, sometimes even sensible people need to be lame for a while until someone tells 'em how they're s'posed to behave.
WaRe FuCKeR: And there are even some girls there too!!!
RITU: Well, there's girlfriends for y'all boys then, tee-hee...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I've already got a couple of candidates for those real men's systems... So WE FUCKIN' AIN'T GONNA START WRITIN' NUFFIN' TO THAT KINDA LAMEPLACES!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And at least not flirt to some empty-head blondes who make some helluva big phone bills 'coz of their stupidity...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: So big that they could like buy a fuckin' peecee and modem with that modem and go to like IRC with 'em!!!
JUiCE: Yeah, it'd be all the same to ask the phone company to block our calls to pay-numbers, so we wouldna write there even by accident.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, I was plannin' to warn ya 'bout this, Terttu, that ya should now order a blockin' of 9700-numbers as soon as possible!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: 'Cause Warie seems so zealous 'bout that system that he's sure to try it secretly at yer home...
TERTTU: I don't reckon that Kassu...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya never know if he got quite eager 'bout that, 'coz his self-discipline is a bit weak...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And he did make ya a helluva bill last spring, didn't he?
TERTTU: Oh, yeah, maybe I could then call Tele right there next Monday.
OH7MO: I'd recommend that too, just in case.
WaRe FuCKeR: I wouldna go there for real!!!
OH7MO: It'd of course be a different thang with a rich man like Reijo, he wouldna even notice if there were a few more thousand marks in the phone bill.
WaRe FuCKeR: Right, we could try it there then!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: SSSSH! (Can't ya remember what I said...)
WaRe FuCKeR: Oh, yeah, right, sorry.
OH7MO: But 'twas a really good thang that Reijo let y'all back here in Lahnala!
OH7MO: Would've become some harsh business, havin' to warm up the house even if nobody even gets to live there.
JUiCE: We should maybe start warmin' up Hönttölä as well, 'cause of that there board machine...
OH7MO: Right, some warmth needed there too, yeah.
OH7MO: Wonder if it'd add a lot to the electricity bills if we brough some heater there in the toilet?
OH7MO: And maybe put in some isolation in the door and the walls nearby...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, might be good to check out that one. But it's indeed really good that Reijo let us back here!
RITU: I reckon I've seen all of Reijo already, feels like our love's not workin' anymaw...
WaRe FuCKeR: HAS THAT HERE REIJO BECOME IMPOTENT???
RITU: Err... well... where have ye learned such words, Kassu...?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, has he become that?
RITU: Well, err... he really doesna get naw hard-on anymaw...
WaRe FuCKeR: WE MADE IT!!! WE MADE IT!!! WOWWW!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: SHUT UP!
TERTTU: What did y'all make?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: NUFFIN' FOR YA!!
TERTTU: Is this somehow connected to them Satan-worshippings y'all have? Be careful with that, boys, once y'all give the little finger -
mR.mEgAsTuFf: D'ya think ya could gossip around in the villages that we supposedly made Reijo impotent with some magic powers?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: HEY, THINK ABOUT YAR REPUTATION THERE, DAMMIT!! WHO DA HELL EVEN BELIEVES THAT KINDA STUFF!?!
OH7MO: I reckon there might be quite a bunch of folks in the villages hwo believe...
OH7MO: And we've even been havin' them there sage traditions goin' strong here in Lietevesi, even in the war times...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah but still!!!
TERTTU: It would be best for y'all to conjure Reijo's wee-wee back to work and also take back all of the Satan-worshippings of y'alls!
TERTTU: I heard aboot ye Jyri that yer hat leading Satan-worshipping fella in yer gang...
dArK sTuFfEr: Satan is actually totally different from Satan-worshipping...
TERTTU: So, if y'all ain't got the power to take back the spells on yer own, then ask some expert from the church.
TERTTU: And if the Lutherans ain't got a proper exorcist, then let's ask the Orthodox congregation!
TERTTU: Like, bring some leadin' monk from Heinävesi to chant 'em hymns, if it looks really bad...
TERTTU: So, y'all still got the chance to return to Jesus!
dArK sTuFfEr: We ain't slightly interested in any of yer Jesus...
JUiCE: Right, it's all the same kinda superstition!
JUiCE: And I'm sure Reijo got that impotence of his from his own superstition, and it's got nuffin' to do with our toyin'...
RITU: Yeah, it really sounds like that Reijo has made himself like that all by himself.
TERTTU: Y'all still gonna return to Christian faith!!! Tell that I told this!!!
RITU: But I guess I'm gonna hafta leave back to Hovila quite soon, 'cause I promised Reijo that I ain't here for very long...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: But can I sleep here next night? Was that okay for Reijo?
RITU: I don't reckon he's gonna stop ya.
RITU: We're even signed papers for divorce, so I don't reckon he's got any will to own ye anymaw...
WaRe FuCKeR: YEAAAH, WE'RE GONNA GET TO BE HERE LIKE THE WHOLE NIGHT!!!
TERTTU: Not the whole night, ye should come back naw later than twelve!!!
WaRe FuCKeR: So unfair!!!
TERTTU: And it's a reason for house arrest if we don't see ye home at twelve!
WaRe FuCKeR: Yeah, right, okey, mum... I'm gonna return...
RITU: But let's now go from here!
OH7MO: Nuffin' but have a good rest of yer birthday party, boys, and let's see y'all tomorrow at network installation!
TERTTU: Bye-bye then there!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Bye...
JUiCE: Bye...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Okay, let's get back upstairs.
...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Allright, now we can return to da TOP SECRET business!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: How did it go with yer kilju, JUiCE?
JUiCE: I was already tastin' it beforehand and I guess it might've become quite nice!
JUiCE: 'Twas worthwhile to ask my old dad for a recipe instead of followin' that shitty HPA file...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: We should then release da recipe like tomorrow if it makes us drunk well!
dArK sTuFfEr: I reckon ye should ask yer dad for other stuff as well, 'cause he's got them there tradition contacts...
JUiCE: Some fuckin' superstition...
dArK sTuFfEr: They don't hafta be naw actual sage things there.
JUiCE: Let's see then.
dArK sTuFfEr: By the way, is that Tim even makin' any music anymaw, as he quit that Warehouse as well?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I think he ain't interested in doin' nothin' but gamin' with da computer.
dArK sTuFfEr: Could he maybe like swap his GUS with that Sound Blaster of mine?
dArK sTuFfEr: 'Cause games would work better with Blaster anyway, and there ain't naw extra benefit from GUS there.
dArK sTuFfEr: But I would actually benefit some from it, 'cause my 386 runs out of power when tryin' to soft-mix too many channels...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I don't believe he'd agree with that, but I could try to ask sumthing from him anyway.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Or if I get him to beg for some new Blaster-compatible soundcard then he could maybe sell da GUS away cheaply.
dArK sTuFfEr: He'd be askin' some helluva price for it anyway...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: If I maybe told him that GUS is totally shitty for real and nobody does nuffin' with it anymaw.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: 'Cause that fuckin' lamer is now plannin' to upgrade his fuckin' 486 to Pentium, in order to get Doom and other vector games run smoother...
JUiCE: But would we start kilju already?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Allright, let's start then.
JUiCE: There's the first draught for today's hero...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: (glug glug glug)
mR.mEgAsTuFf: This is actually like the best kilju I've ever tasted!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And hey, by the way...
JUiCE: Whatta?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I heard that the next Juhla would be in January!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: AND NOW WE AIN'T GOT NO OBSTACLES FOR GETTIN' THERE, 'CAUSE REIJO'S OUTTA DA GAME!!!
JUiCE: (glug glug glug)
WaRe FuCKeR: YEAHH, WE'RE GONNA GET TO JUHLA!!!
JUiCE: Wonder if Tarnel's comin' there too?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I ain't been interested to check her stuff lately 'coz it feels that da Riia from Oulu is so much more promisin'.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And at least Riia said that she could be comin' to next Juhla!
WaRe FuCKeR: (glug glug glug)
WaRe FuCKeR: Have ye already gotten laid by that there Riia???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: No, I ain't even fuckin' seen her yet!! I've gotta visit Oulu some weekend for a date.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And then he could also come here to Lietevesi, even though I wouldn't dare to show her this kind of backwaters village...
JUiCE: At least Sam was quite happy aboot askin' her girl here for the autumn holiday...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And ya couldn't help but mention that fuckin' Sam!!! That kinda BBBS lamer and gettin' darker all da time with that schistic!!!
dArK sTuFfEr: (glug glug glug)
dArK sTuFfEr: I've also noticed that he's changed...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Right!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I'm not gonna fuckin' ask Riia to Lietevesi 'coz that'd be so blatant and lame Sam-imitation!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: All da FUCKIN' BBBS LAMERS like him bring chicks to visit some pitiful hillbilly villages...
dArK sTuFfEr: That could be like that too, yeah.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: But hey, I could maybe try out this node now...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Like, put up a dial for Frontline, and then I could also throw in my board advert there to da local and net message areas...
WaRe FuCKeR: Yeah!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, da lines are workin'!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: LONG LIVE C00LeS WaReZ UNiON AND ITS ETERNAL UNITY!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: LONG LIVE GETTIN' TO JUHLA, AND LONG LIVE CWU'S NEW WHQ BOARD SLAUGHTERHOUSE 3000!!!
««- · CWU MEMOiRS 0x47 · nExT cHApTeR -»»