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========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x16 =========

DaTE:     1994-11-02 aT aBoUT 17:00

LoCATiON: mR.mEgAsTuFf's r00m, hAutAtAiPALe, LiEtEvEdEN KuNTA, FiNLAND

PrESeNT:  CWU mEMbERS (ELiTE):

          mR.mEgAStUFf   cAME DiRecTLY wITh sCHOOL bUS fROM kIRkONkYLaE
          FaTHeR FuCKeR  cAME DiRecTLY wITh sCHOOL bUS fROM kIRkONkYLaE
          dArK sTuFfEr   cAME DiRecTLY wITh sCHOOL bUS fROM kIRkONkYLaE
          WoRLD HeR0     cAME DiRecTLY wITh sCHOOL bUS fROM kIRkONkYLaE
          MoTHeR FuCKeR  cAME DiRecTLY wITh sCHOOL bUS fROM kIRkONkYLaE
          FaTHeR FuCKeR  cAME DiRecTLY wITh sCHOOL bUS fROM kIRkONkYLaE

          LAMERS:

          RiTVA "RITU" ToSSAvAiNEN (mR.mEgAsTuFf's MotHER)
          tERTTu kOpSAnEN (PHUKKEN BiTCH!!! FaTheR FuCKeR's mOThA)
          oSMO käRKkÄiNEN (nOT aCtUALly LAMeR buT Non-cWU LAmeR anYWaY)

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mR.mEgAsTuFf: Allright... Shut da door!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Wonder where I hided da closet key...? I always lose all da keyz!

MoTHeR FuCKeR: WHERE'S THAT THERE AMIGA OF YERS S'POSED TO ME?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: SHUT UP 'bout dat Amiga now! We only talk quietly about da Amiga!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: It's there in the closet as I said... so Ritu and no one else gets suspicious!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Oh, there's the key! Wait till I open da door...

MoTHeR FuCKeR: That there Amiga looks really right tuff!

dA dArK ELiTE: Looks just the same as all the Amigas...

MoTHeR FuCKeR: It looks a bit different...

dA dArK ELiTE: Goddammit then, all the same...

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Pleeze pleeze, show us already what's there in that there floppy! Pleeze pleeze!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Okay then, wait...

MoTHeR FuCKeR: Don't ye hafta put the floppy in when ye turn it on?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Dood, HEY, there's a hard disk, don't ya geddit! No need for any boot disk...

MoTHeR FuCKeR: Allright, allright...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Shiiit, guess it was a bootdisk anyway! Ok, let's boot it then...

FaTHeR FuCKeR: I'm so excited!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: All da true elitez always have helluva proggiez that show their messages...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Oh my god, this is so damn elite!!! All the way up to personal messages ya only see if ya type yar handle!!!

FaTHeR FuCKeR: OH WOW!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Da doodz have made such a fuckin' sick writer!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Oh my god!!!

MoTHeR FuCKeR: Vae-ae-ae-rae...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fink it's supposed to say "Vääräpää"... at least one of those COP elite doodz has lived in Vääräpää...

dA dArK ELiTE: And it stands like "Öökkölä" up there?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah...

dA dArK ELiTE: Why in hell couldna they just put Ä and Ö directly in them there names?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fuck's sake, it belongs to da elite style that all kindsa lamerz can read it easily!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: And elitez never use any Nordic letters dammit!!!

dA dArK ELiTE: But I bet ye know where's that there Öökkölä house is?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Dunno for sure...

dA dArK ELiTE: Okey, I can tell ye how to get there... or is anybody else even gonna come with?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Maybe someone could came...

FaTHeR FuCKeR: At least I wanna come with!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fuck's sake, at least they don't want YA there, ya fukken gay-handle-clown!

FaTHeR FuCKeR: I still wanna write my own handle in there!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, I guess there's nuffin' to lose...

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Meh, there wasna no message for me...

dArK sTuFfEr: Couldna we try eveybody else's handles there too?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah...

dArK sTuFfEr: Whatta hell? They wanna me to be there also!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Rather ya than that whiny moron...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Goddammit, check all of yar handles thru then!

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Coulda I get there also even if I dinna get any personal message...?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya fukken can't!

FaTHeR FuCKeR: So unfair!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: We follow REAL_ELiTES' wishes like LITERALLY!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Our superkewl elite summit is only for those who got invitations!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: And especially any whiners or Amiga-haters WON'T BLOODY FUCKIN' EVER GET TO COME WITH!!

dA dArK ELiTE: I wouldna have even wanted it, dammit...

FaTHeR FuCKeR: There wasna messages for nobody else...

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Hey, can I try to write somethang else here still?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya fuckin' can't!

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Pleeze...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: We already got da required message... next friday at twenty-zero-zero in the Öökkölä abandoned house in Väärpää!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: And none else can come with but me and Stuffie!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Turnin' the computer off now...

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Don't do it yet!!! I wanna -

dA dArK ELiTE: Do we need that there Amiga after this anymaw? Could we already bring it -

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, operation SMFKAG will start at da first possible occassion!

dA dArK ELiTE: Yeah... let's write the time and place down and then we could pack the Amiga up right now!

RITU: COME ON HERE BOYS, COFFEE'S WAITIN'!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Oh, right, she made some coffee...

dA dArK ELiTE: GODDAMMIT... guess we can still wait for a short while with this...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, let's shut the closet door and get downstairs!

dA dArK ELiTE: Yeah...

RITU: Oh, there's so many of y'all! Let's put some more cuppies ready then.

TERTTU: Seems Jyri's here too... I heard ye have left Communism, Jyri! That's the way!

dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, good that ye finally got it... and I haven't been any communist in the first place!

TERTTU: If yer mother or father wish to persecute ye for no more believin' in red thoughts, then ye can always get an asylum in our hut!

TERTTU: Right-minded victims of Communism always gotta be protected!

dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, gotta think aboot it...

TERTTU: From us ye can get honest Centre-Party upbringin'!

TERTTU: Yer truly such a good boy that communists and other Devil's people never deserve ye!

TERTTU: So, if yer interested in Home, Religion and Fatherland, then welcome to our family!

dArK sTuFfEr: Okey okey, let's see...

RITU: Take some jelly roll, boys...

dA dArK ELiTE: Guess we might take some, yeah.

RITU: All these terrors of modern times! Did y'all read in Perä-Savo News that they had stolen the computer from that Jaakko Pennanen's son?

RITU: They even interviewed Jaakko in that story...

TERTTU: Sure I did, there had been some gossips goin' in the last week already! All these communist tricks...

RITU: There was printed in the paper that the police folks are suspectin' some boy gang in the town...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah... lemme explain...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: There are some town guys on our grade who think all Amigas should be destroyed...

RITU: What did ye say, "Amigas"...?

OSMO: It's like a brand of computers...

RITU: Oh, right, now I rembmer! Who cares what brand the computer is?

dArK sTuFfEr: Fuck's sake, y'all care too if a tractor is a Valmet or a Massey-Ferguson!

dArK sTuFfEr: Or if y'all fuel it up at Esso or Teboil...

dArK sTuFfEr: Or if y'all drive it on the Lahopää or Höttövaara road even if both roads take there!

TERTTU: Well, sure nothin' else matters in the long run than if we get to Heaven or Hell after we die...

OSMO: Might be, but televisions still must be Salora and not Finlux, we can't bend to anything else!

RITU: Reckon the whole village's on Salora's side? Only some citylords buy Finlux, I guess...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Is it then somehow hard to get that there are separate PC gangs and Amiga gangs on the town?

TERTTU: Well, which brand is Red and which brand is White?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ehh, I mean -

TERTTU: What brand of maschinka do communist kiddies play with?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya can't say it like that!

OSMO: Many boys in Hautataipale first had Amiga and then we replaced them with peecees.

OSMO: There's no politics there, some folks just might not have the money to buy a peecee, so they continue usin' that there old-fashioned Amiga...

TERTTU: So, if they hain't got the money, then might they be the communists then?

OSMO: Yeah, guess they might be then...

TERTTU: Don't y'all boys get messed with them there Amiga folks! Or they'll brainwash y'all to make a revolution!

dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah... we won't mess with them...

TERTTU: Just be proud peecee boys there!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: But at least I'd rather let town-dwellers fight each other about Amiga and PC! At least I'm not interested in their gang wars...

TERTTU: Yeah, they're so terrible, all those youngster gangs! It's good that y'all boys hain't gone into them!

TERTTU: And stealing is always wrong! Don't y'all boys go to steal anythang, no matter how communist they might be! It'd only take y'all to Hell and not Heaven...

TERTTU: But well, Kasper, was yer own maschinka of that Amiga brand?

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah, it is...

TERTTU: Shouldna we sell it away, a communist device as it is?

RITU: I don't reckon that them commies have money to buy it...

TERTTU: I reckoned the same!

TERTTU: Wonder if that's got any sort of resell value? What would Osmo say here?

OSMO: Don't really know... those brand things are so important in the computer world! Nobody wants any Amiga unless they wanna be old-fashioned...

TERTTU: Should we take it to the landfill then?

TERTTU: At lesat we shouldna leave it in the attic! It could infect us with all kindsa communist filths and Chernobyl cancers!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Hey, wait for a moment with that...

TERTTU: I don't wish to see any sort of communist gear in our hut! That there Amiga of yers shall leave the hut on the next landfill load!

FaTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah... allright then...

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