««- · CWU MEMOiRS 0x0D · -»»
========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x0D =========
DaTE: 1994-10-03 aT aBoUT 18:00
LoCATiON: MyStERiA's r00m, hAutAtAiPALe, LiEtEvEdEN KuNTA, FiNLAND
PrESeNT: MyStERiA iz dA sYsOP oF C00LeS WaReZ UNiON dA WHQ bOaRD!!!
mR.mEgAStUFF hAs pCBoARD dISkEtTEs wItH hImSelF
FaTHeR FuCKeR cAmE wITH BiCyCLE
dArK sTUFfER cAmE wITH hIS MoThER TARJA (HoRRiFiC COMMUNiST SLUT!)===========================================================================
MyStERiA: Why were you lying today that...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: D'ya fink I dare to admit to some traitor-lamer boss that we too have some SUPER-BBS in our board!!! Good that we at least have a private board so he can't come and check it!
MyStERiA: Well, actually it shows -
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I've got a preconf'd PCBoard with me on floppies... we've gotta install it today!
MyStERiA: I should do my homework too...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: OUR CREW'S FAME now goes before homework!!! Ya can lie tomorrow dat yar sick or something if ya can't install da new soft tonight!
MyStERiA: But, I mean -
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And have ya ever thought dat yar handle is quite fukken lame... fukken MyStERiA... totally a FITTIN' HANDLE FOR AN SBBS LAMER!!! We could throw ya outta da crew even for that!
MyStERiA: No need to... I'll put the PCBoard in today...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And also change your handle then!!!
MyStERiA: Well, if I just change this board software first and then think about the handle...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, guess yar more busy with that one... fukken MIKKO-LAMER forced us to change our boardsoft in da middle of da week!!!
MyStERiA: Yeah, he's quite dumb, that Mikko...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And fukken traitor-lamerz reveal all of our secret to Mikko, so he can imitate** 'em and catch our **etumatka, dammit!! We should find some way to pay back to Mikko!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Could we put that kind**of file in some boxie, where Mikko - **
mR.mEgAsTuFf: WHAT'S DAT BACKWATERS BABBLIN'??
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Oh, yeah, sorry... I mean can we like make a kinda capture of da Mikko...?
MyStERiA: But ain't captures...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: A capture would be great!! Especially now that he's got dat lameboard of his, we could call it and kusettaa** da lame-o like hell!!! And then upload da whole shit to every fukken elite board so everyone sees how lame dood he is!!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, a capture of Mikko would rule like hell!!
MyStERiA: But I'll need to get that there PCBoard installed...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: For da fucks sake, we have da time to make one cappie in between... DO YAR FUKKEN HOMEWORK in da meantime or somethin'!
MyStERiA: Yeah...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Are we gonna use a fake name?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ofcoz a fake name, like always before!!
MyStERiA: Have we called somewhere with a fake name sometime before?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah... y'know... yes, we did... when ya wuzn't in da crew yet.
FaTHeR FuCKeR: 'Twas some true fun! Pleeze pleeze, can we call right to that there Mikko's board!! Pleeze pleeze, can we call -
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fukken lamer, it ain't open yet!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: All right!?!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: A lame nightboard like dat... did he say 21 to 07?
dArK sTuFfEr: Guess he said 21 to 23!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Bwahah, whole two hours uptime before mutta tells to turn off da computer!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Oh, it won't open until nine?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: We'll be doin' this at quite late hours anyway!
MyStERiA: Can we get its number anywhere...?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Oh, right, 'coz da new 97X list ain't released yet! Well, I bet he's made some fukken lame advert and put it to some advert area of Neuvosto-Savo...
MyStERiA: Yeah, I guess it's there...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And if we can't find it in Neuvosto-Savo, then we can check da phone directory. I guess there ain't many named Kallio in Lietevesi...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Fukk with dat lame Finnish-langauge name!! And praisin' some Russkies on top of that!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, Russkies are from arse...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah, and commies especially...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fukken shut up now, Neuvosto-Savo is a good board even though they don't have any wartez!! Or there may be some in some secret conf but -
FaTHeR FuCKeR: But, I mean, ain't them there Finnish -
mR.mEgAsTuFf: If yar TRUE-ELITE then ya can deviate from da rule!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Oh, right, I didna know that it's some elite board!! Hey, can we call Neuvosto-Savo right now, I mean pleeze pleeze???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Okay, let's call then...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Do we use a fake name there too??
mR.mEgAsTuFf: We can use my real name as well...
MyStERiA: Will I interrupt this copying for the meantime?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Finish copying that disk and then let's do da call!
MyStERiA: Okay...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: I've got one fake name ready I've called dat board with! Can I, pleeze pleeze -
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, if ya want it so much, then do log in with it, but then gimme da keyboard!
MyStERiA: Now I've finished copying it, I'm starting the call then...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: I'm so excited!!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Are ye always excited by calling every board?
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Hey, we got in!!! I'm gonna type my fake name now... Wow, how fast all da texts be comin'!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Come on, it's just 14400 baud without any terbo speeds. And let's not stop wonder da views, just deal with it as fast as possible so we can resume da PCBoard install... Conf number five is "Advertisements"...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Look, there's Mikko Kallio and Pillu Paikka there!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Allright! Bwahahah, fukken lamer's been usin' Thedraw stock fonts in his advert, makes him so credible, bwahah!! ... Okay, now I've written da numba donwn, let's log out then...
...
MyStERiA: Now I've transferred all da ansis from SBBS to PCB... Can I start doin' my homework already???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, I don't think we need ya anymore, I can finish da configz.
FaTHeR FuCKeR: It's over nine o'clock already!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Oh yeah.
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Can we call that there Mikko's board, righty-right?? I've been thinkin' aboot all kinda good kusetus**!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, right, we needed to do that capture too, bwahahah!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Which fake name would we use... would dat Aleksi Pennanen be good??
MyStERiA: Hey!! I know one Aleksi Pennanen...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Oh, right...
MyStERiA: Or know about him... called my board with some 2400-baud shit a couple of months ago...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, ehm... he's quite a well-known megalamer...
MyStERiA: Yeah, but if Mikko knows him too... and that he's a 2400 lamer...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Right... so we need to come up with some other name so dat our modem speed won't reveal us!!! Just keep doin' yar homework while we're finkin'...
MyStERiA: Yeah, okay...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Laamanen would be a real family name!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Bwahahah, Laamanen... shows up as a fake too easily! What kind of lamer names would there be? At least we'll put Aleksi as his first name, but what about da family name...?
dArK sTuFfEr: Would Kekkonen be good?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, bwahah, KEKKONEN would indeed be good... ALEKSI KEKKONEN... does it show up as a fake too easily?
FaTHeR FuCKeR: If he won't believe then we can kusettaa** that Urho is his grampa...?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah!!! Hey, we'll need to call soon before some lamer gets da node first...
dArK sTuFfEr: Can I write?
FaTHeR FuCKeR: I'd like too...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: No, let's let Stuffie write... Fathie can give **kusetus tips 'coz he's already thought 'bout 'em... and I can also give a tip every now and then!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Can we get to callin' already???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: I'm excited!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Shut up with that already...
CONNECT 14400
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah, we got in!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Bwahah, he's only got a v.32bis and no Terbo at all!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: A piss modem, bwahahah!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: No, dammit, Sammy's modem's also just a v.32bis, sorry... well, at least my modem's a Terbo and Mikko's ain't! And Mikko's logo is in some Thedraw stock font and ours ain't, bwahah!
dArK sTuFfEr: Will I put that there Aleksi Kekkonen as the name?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: And came to the chat right away!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: With some fukken splitscreen chatter!! Our captures will get totally messed!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Bwahahah, his handle is "THE SCENEMAN"!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: BWAHAHAH!!! HOW HE DARES**kehdata!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Is da capture on for sure??
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fukk, it ain't... let me put it... like dat...
Aleksi Kekkonen: What for?
Mikko Kallio: A mega uploader calls me soon and uploads more porn here...
dArK sTuFfEr: What should I say to him now?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ofcoz ya've got a lot more porn than him!
Mikko Kallio: Sumthing like 2 megs first... and then more if i think their good
mR.mEgAsTuFf: A two-meg mega porn upload!! Bwahahah!!!
Mikko Kallio: But i shood pay u more becos it makes bigger phone bill...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Oh, someone's promised to upload 'em for a price, bwahahah!!!
Mikko Kallio: Really??? u r so generous to me... that one wanted 10 marks for the phone costs
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Ask him what kinda porn he would like...
Mikko Kallio: Do u have like HC porn... like with a chain saw that they push into the pussy...
dArK sTuFfEr: Fuckin' pearls of cunt!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Ya made up quite a good one!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Don't promise everthang to him yet!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, ask like how old he is...
Mikko Kallio: Im 18... studying wood works in vocational school...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And lied his age!!! Whatta lame-o!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Ask a bit if he likes that himself? Or if he just wants to show him to the classmates...
Mikko Kallio: I like it myself too... at least that chain saw stuff... but i guess i might like some drill stuff too...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: BWAHAHAHAH!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Try to ask sump'n that would reveal more!!
Mikko Kallio: Yeah... yes actually... when those Jussi and Masa in my class don't get hard enough porn from me then they start to get it from one Mikko and his gang...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Try to get him insult them!!
Mikko Kallio: Oh, it's quite sick indeed... i think i like more of those basic pussy pix anyway... but they stop being my friends if i don't bring them those sick chain saw pix...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!
Mikko Kallio: Yeah can u upload today those first few megs so i can bring them some disks to them to school...
Aleksi Kekkonen: Yeah... wait a minute, I'll find a package for you...
dArK sTuFfEr: Hey, do we have anything to upload???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Hey, MyStERiA, have ya got any porn???
MyStERiA: I don't have any...
dArK sTuFfEr: So what will we use then?
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Let's upload some proggy to him, something he can run only tomorrow?
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, let's give him some game and say it normally looks like a game but starts bein' some fukken HC PORN SHOW tomorrow night...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Bwahah! Dat's a really good one!!
MyStERiA: Give him something like Commander Keen...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, come and find it for us... let's just change the filename for somethin' tuff...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Would GOLLECTION be good one?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fukken lamer, there's more than eight letters... Put sumthin' like HC-COLLY or sumthin'...
dArK sTuFfEr: Can you do that, Sammy...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Use that handle dammit!!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, I mean MyStERiA...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Have ya already made up a better handle??? Fukken MyStERiA...
MyStERiA: Not yet... Well, there's that there package anyway!
Aleksi Kekkonen: Sorry, it took some time for me to put up that activation...
Mikko Kallio: What activation??? Can u upload those pix for me already??? FUCKING PLZ!!
Aleksi Kekkonen: This stuff it so hardcore that i needed to disguise it as a game... there's an activation day and password...
Mikko Kallio: What? Don't u use QPEG proggy to look at it???
Aleksi Kekkonen: Nope... you'll need to start that game and write the password there... and it won't work before tomorrow at 13... then that game will turn into a hc porn viewer with some REALLY FUCKING SICK pics...
Mikko Kallio: I'm so excited... Mika and his gang will be so fucking jealous when they hear that i have so hc porn!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: BWAHAHAH!!!
Mikko Kallio: Yeah... no, ytell me the password first...
Aleksi Kekkonen: Okay, the password there is PROHIBITEDFROMLAMERS...
Mikko Kallio: Heh, yeah... even tho thats a bit long to write...
Aleksi Kekkonen: But can i upload it already???
Mikko Kallio: Ok... i'll go away for the meantime...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Bwahahahah!!! I can handle da uploadin'... dat fukken lamer ain't even got any bi-directional protocol so we've gotta use some lamers' zmodem...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: WHATTA FUKKEN LAME-O, BELIEVED EVERTHANG WE SAID!!!
dArK sTuFfEr: BWAHAHAHAHAH... should we copy that capture to the traitor-lamers?
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah... but it'd be great if they could read it already in the daytime tomorrow!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: We should perhaps print it... MyStERiA, have ya got a printer? Oh, there is one...
MyStERiA: Yeah, there is...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: DAT WAS DA BEST PRANK EVER!!! BWAHAHAH!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Can we print already??
mR.mEgAsTuFf: We'll need to edit it a bit first 'coz it's got that split screen chatter junk messin' it... And then put all da CWU credz in da beginnin' and then all kinds of strikin' comments in da between like real capture crews have!! And some good title there... like "MIKKO KALLIO IS MUCH LAMER"!!!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And before we upload it to boards we'll need to have a true FILE_ID.DIZ with somethin' like "C00LeS WaReZ UNiON PRoUDLY PReSENTS" on da first row... can ya do da diz, Fathie?
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: MIKKO WILL LOSE ALL OF HIS SCENE CREDZ TOMORROW WHEN TRAITOR-LAMERZ SEE HOW LAME HE IS!!! WHAT A TOTAL FUKKEN DUMB-ASS!!! EVEN ANTI-LAMER CORPORATION COULDN'T MAKE A PRANK AS GOOD AS THIS!!! BWAHAHAHAH!!!
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