««- · CWU MEMOiRS 0x06 · -»»
========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x06 =========
DaTE: 1994-08-15 aT aBoUT 09:00
LoCATi0N: LuOKKA 4, LiETeVeDeN yLÄaSTE, LiEtEvEdEn KiRkOnKYLä, FiNLAND
PrESeNT: KERTTU-OPE oUR tEaChER, fUCkING AnnOYInG BITCH!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf cAmE WiTH sChOOL BuS fROM hAutATAiPALE
dA dArK ELiTE cAmE WiTH sChOOL BuS fROM hAutATAiPALE
FaTHeR FuCKeR cAmE WiTH sChOOL BuS fROM hAutATAiPALE
MoTHeR FuCKeR cAmE WiTH sChOOL BuS fROM hAutATAiPALE
MyStERiA cAmE WiTH sChOOL BuS fROM hAutATAiPALE
+ LoTSa LaMeRZ iNCLUDiNG MiKKO "tHE sKENEMiES" KALLiO===========================================================================
KERTTU-OPE: So, welcome to the seventh grade at Lietevesi junior high school! I am your form mistress Kerttu Korhonen, and I also teach you Finnish language. In the beginning, we shall go through all the pupils of your class 7A, in alphabetical order. Once you have heard your name, you must introduce yourself, that is, tell something about yourself and your hobbies. Any questions?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: (whatta fukken bitch...)
KERTTU-OPE: As no one apparently has any questions, let us begin: Alarastas, Samuli!
MyStERiA: Y-yeah... I live in Hautataipale... and my hobbies are computers and reading...
KERTTU-OPE: Are you the son of Arja Alarastas?
MyStERiA: Y-yeah, I am... except that her surname is Kärkkäinen-Alarastas...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha. Is Arja still working as a teacher at the Hautataipale elementary school?
MyStERiA: Y-yeah, she is...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha. Arja is one of my good acquaintances as well... Hirvonen, Juha!
dA dArK ELiTE: Well... I'm just Jussi... from Hautataipale... and I'm doin' farm work and drivin' tractor and moped, and I also fish...
KERTTU-OPE: The Hirvonens of Hautataipale are indeed an old and traditional family...
dA dArK ELiTE: Yeah, they sure are...
KERTTU-OPE: Indeed... Holopainen, Jaana!
JANETZU: Hihihih... hi, I'm Janetzu... right here from town... and my hobbies are music-listening, discos, and, tee-hee, guys...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha... Kallio, Mikko!
MIKKO: Err... I'm Mikko... and karate and computer.
KERTTU-OPE: Do you always go to Pielavesi and have** your karate classes there?
MIKKO: N-no... right here at Lietevesi town I've been doin' those classes...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha... Karhunen, Merja!
MERJA: I'm from Vääräpää... and I like milkin' cows and bakin'...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha... Kopsanen, Kasper!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Joo, mie oon Kassu ja...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: (use that fukken handle dammit!)
KERTTU-OPE: Krhm!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Well, I mean I'm Kasper, that's Kassu... and my hobby's playin' with the computer...
KERTTU-OPE: That playing with the computer is a worryingly popular hobby nowadays, especially when not doing anything besides that... it is so monotonous and one-sides... perhaps the most harmful of any hobbies conceivable today...
FaTHeR FuCKeR: Err..
mR.mEgAsTuFf: (fukken fukk!!!)
KERTTU-OPE: Be quiet there in the back row! Korhonen, Heli!
HELI: Well, dogs and horses.
KERTTU-OPE: "Dogs and horses"?
HELI: Oh, right, well, heheh, I am Heli... from the town...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha. Korhonen, Matti!
MoTHeR FuCKeR: Well, I'm just Masa... and I'm into farm work and tunin' my moped...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: (handle!!!)
MoTHeR FuCKeR: Shut yar hatch there, Tossavainen...
KERTTU-OPE: WHAT!!!
MoTHeR FuCKeR: Errr...
KERTTU-OPE: Krhm... Let us be civilized now... Matti Korhonen, you say? Don't you happen to be the brother of Antti Korhonen?
MoTHeR FuCKeR: Yeah... I'm that...
KERTTU-OPE: You have much of the same looks. Kuusinen, Jyri!
JYRI: Yeah, I'm Jyri... from Hautataipale... and I'm into music... I've got a guitar...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha. Kähkönen, Piia!
PIIA: Well, I am Piia Kähkönen and reading and horse-riding!
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha. Pirinen, Tiina!
TIINA: Yeah... Tiina Pirinen from Hautataipale... and I'm into playing violin and horses.
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha. Poikolainen, Päivi!
PÄIVI: Tee-hee... I'm Päivi... from the town... and I'm into listenin' to music and collectin' clothes... and some volleyball...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha. Romppainen, Jani!
JANI: Well, hi there... I'm Jani Romppainen and I'm into football and karate and ice hockey...
KERTTU-OPE: I assume you are from the town?
JANI: Yeah, I'm from right there, yes...
KERTTU-OPE: A-ha... Tossavainen, Mika!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, right, I'm mR.mEgAsTuFf slash C00LeS WaReZ UNiON... If ya dunno 'bout CWU then yar so goddamn lame... da tuffest wareaz group on da scene... we fukken trade...
KERTTU-OPE: WHAT!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: WHATTA FUKKEN "WHAT"???
KERTTU-OPE: STOP SWEARING ON MY CLASS!!! And you could also talk in the way that others in the class understand you as well! What are your hobbies?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I'm on da fukken scene... and I don't let any fukken lamerz push me around...
KERTTU-OPE: WHAT???
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, LAMERZ... or should I say DARN STOOPID DUNGHEADS, ya fukken hillbilly!?!?
KERTTU-OPE: GO TO THE CORNER AND BE ASHAMED!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: LIKE WHAT!!!
KERTTU-OPE: OUT!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Can I go for real?
KERTTU-OPE: Yes, you can... and must...
SLAM!
FaTHeR FuCKeR: (bwahahah!)
KERTTU-OPE: Krhm... I guess this Mika is the brother of Sari Tossavainen... I still wouldn't have believed that I need to order detention to someone on the first day of school. Hmm, I guess Mika was the last in the introductory round. Next, we shall go through the school regulations...
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