««- · CWU MEMOiRS 0x7B · -»»
========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x7B =========
DaTE: 1996-08-31 aT 10:48
LoCATi0N: PiRtTiMaEKi-pORoNSuO rOAd, LiEtEVESi
PrESeNT: wArlord - mR.mEgAsTuFf - dArK sTuFfeR - DaRK FuCKeR - myXter ===========================================================================
DaRK FuCKeR: Phew... phew...
wArlord: Well, there's them cyclists at last now.
DaRK FuCKeR: Could we have some break afore we continue?? Pleeze Pleeze?? I'm so outta strength already!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Apparently, you had been using a moped instead of bicycle for too long. Your physical condition has deteriorated.
DaRK FuCKeR: But I'm still not regrettin' at all that I swapped my moped for a 486!
wArlord: But yeah, we could have a coffee break now.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I actually feel we should get there as soon as possible...
DaRK FuCKeR: Well, I canna continue if I canna have a break first!!
dArK sTuFfEr: A short pause is completely reasonable, although we should avoid using our limited supply of coffee.
wArlord: Well, we've still got many thermoses of the brew, that's gotta be enuff for wakin' up Heikki.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, and didn't da cop buy him a coffee package last time? So we can even make new coffee if we run out of ours...
dArK sTuFfEr: It should be noticed that we require a stove and firewood for that at Vornanen's. Too many uncertainties.
wArlord: Man, ye always take care of all possibilities.
dArK sTuFfEr: Waking up Vornas-Heikki is a task of such an utmost importance for our development, that nothing should fail there.
wArlord: Well, I'm still gonna take now some draughts of coffee and some pieces of rye bread.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, I could also take 'em.
dArK sTuFfEr: But I shall abstain from all food and drink until our arrival.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Okay then, torture yarself all freely, dammit...
DaRK FuCKeR: But hey, d'y'all know what?
wArlord: Well, what?
DaRK FuCKeR: I made up a good name for a party when ridin' here!! It could be like GENERATION PARTY!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fuck's sake what a lame-soundin' name, dammit!
DaRK FuCKeR: I was just reckonin' that it's s'posed to create some new generation of sages to Lietevesi...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I think there should be far more edge in parties' names, like there usually is! Some cyber and technical...
wArlord: Ye mean sump'n like GENERATOR PARTY then, or what?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, Generator sounds like a much better party than some fuckin' Generation.
dArK sTuFfEr: I find the reference to generating a new generation excellent in any case. DaRK FuCKeR's aesthetic sense has apparently improved.
DaRK FuCKeR: Hey, that signpost there says Hut!! Does it mean the Pirttimäki hut...?
wArlord: Ain't ye been to Pirttimäki afore? It now means the birchwoods that's grown where the Hut used to be...
DaRK FuCKeR: Could we go to take a glimpse on what's there? Pleeze pleeze!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Absolutely not. Our journey would be unnecessarily prolonged, especially if we encountered an anomalous phenomenenon.
DaRK FuCKeR: But if we got into such a phenomenon, then it'd surely have some purpose on our path!! And now that we're here for once -
dArK sTuFfEr: An exploration journey to Hut is absolutely possible for us even later.
DaRK FuCKeR: Y'all always postpone the visit to Hut, like endlessly!!
wArlord: And besides, Kassu, weren't ye s'posed to be all outta strength?
DaRK FuCKeR: Well, yeah, actually I am...
wArlord: It's still at least ten clicks to Poronsuo. So, it's better if we go there as directly as possible.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Why in da fuck they built da fuckin' cottage in da middle of swamps to begin with...
dArK sTuFfEr: I believe that the Vornanen family has a good reason for this.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: But could we continue already? I feel I'm missin' out a lot of stuff becoz of all this draggin' and pausin'!!
wArlord: What do the cyclist reckon? Is there now enuff strength to continue?
myXTer: At least I've got the strength...
dArK sTuFfEr: I had prepared for a continuous journey to begin with.
DaRK FuCKeR: Well, maybe I can then continue too...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Okay, let's get goin' then, dammit!
...
wArlord: Now there's the coffee rag on mister Sage's face.
DaRK FuCKeR: Should the rest of us wait there in the other room once again?
wArlord: I guess we can all stay here, he's seen us here afore, after all.
dArK sTuFfEr: Mister Sage, it is now the time to wake up again.
Wornas-Heikki: Mmmh...
wArlord: He started his sounds quite quickly, guess he's prepared quite well for this wake-up.
dArK sTuFfEr: Indeed.
Wornas-Heikki: Was the time long?
wArlord: A bit less than a year.
Wornas-Heikki: And ye be the same sageboys from Hautataipale as afore?
wArlord: Yeah, that's we, right.
Wornas-Heikki: And ye had already met with the Joensuu witches who stood against ye?
wArlord: Well, we did meet them, and we gave 'em quite a thorough beatin'!
Wornas-Heikki: I can feel it in yer powers, that ye have beaten yer foes.
Wornas-Heikki: But, could ye aid me to sit up? This body of mine has gotten much more fragile since my last wakin'...
wArlord: Well, let's aid then. After all, there's a hundred and fifty years behind ye...
Wornas-Heikki: Even though one ages slowlier when sleepin', there's some agin' nevertheless.
Wornas-Heikki: But it's good that I aged slowlier enough, so that ye got born a good time afore my death!
wArlord: We've been wonderin' why ye even went to yer sleep instead of just lettin' somebody else go on.
Wornas-Heikki: There was no youngster back then whom I could've trusted my secrets for.
Wornas-Heikki: The Crown had been stranglin' Sage School ever harder, and at the end 'twas a mere secret club in the folkschool -
DaRK FuCKeR: Sage school?
Wornas-Heikki: Do ye not know what Sage School was?
wArlord: Well, I've heard some mentions of the Vääräpää Sage School but dunno more aboot it... it's also been called Oldschool.
DaRK FuCKeR: Yeah, right, Oldschool!
dArK sTuFfEr: I assumed that Oldschool had been a mere metaphor of the time prior to proper schools rather than an actual school.
wArlord: Well, maybe ye don't know it, as yer parents came from elsewhere...
Wornas-Heikki: Back in the seventeenth century, the priests wanted to rid the folk of all what was left of their spells and magick.
Wornas-Heikki: Then, a man named Martti came from Turku to Lietevesi. He'd been sentenced to death for witchcraft, but he could run away.
Wornas-Heikki: He was a learned man, been learin' Latin and Hebrew and all that back there in the university of Turku.
Wornas-Heikki: He then befriended the sages of Vääräpää and wanted to aid them in keepin' their sagely skills.
Wornas-Heikki: They then reckoned that as the Crown hath fine schoolhouses and halls of learnin', the sages shoud have 'em too.
Wornas-Heikki: The school was of course hidden, under a permanent forested-away spell, to stop the churchmen from findin' it.
wArlord: And the same school then stayed up until the nineteenth centry?
Wornas-Heikki: It did that, yes. 'Twas there that I learned to read and all the important learnings.
Wornas-Heikki: Many others merely went to the travellin' school... but Sage School merely accepted the ones who had a sagely nature.
DaRK FuCKeR: But could we now became sages afore ye die?? Pleeze man, I canna wait much longer!!
Wornas-Heikki: Ye be sages already.
dArK sTuFfEr: I assume that DaRK FuCKeR would like to pass some kind of a ritual that confirms our transition to the sagely role.
Wornas-Heikki: I can very well declare ye all as sages. Merely go there, and form a row.
Wornas-Heikki: Did yer club have some name?
mR.mEgAsTuFf: C00LeS WaReZ UNiON.
Wornas-Heikki: Kuoles-varas-unijooni?
wArlord: Just say cee-dubya-you.
Wornas-Heikki: Cee-dubya-you?
wArlord: Yeah.
Wornas-Heikki: I, Heikki Wornahinen / The eldest of the Old School / Have now chosen my successors / Those who receive my power
Wornas-Heikki: Among the sober boys of cee-dubya-you / Among the hard ones of Hautataipale
Wornas-Heikki: To save Lietevesi / To overcome foes / To fell down churchmen / To destroy noblemen
Wornas-Heikki: To open the box of songs / To tune the electric machine / To milk with the milk machine / To lead all the people
Wornas-Heikki: To understand the new part / To know the new knowledge / To let in the new day / To bring in the new Sampo.
Wornas-Heikki: It is now the time / For a time to go and for another to come / For better singers / For more-knowing poets.
Wornas-Heikki: I now ski a track / Dig a new rut there / For the sober boys of cee-dubya-you / For the hard ones of Hautataipale!
BRRUMMM.
DaRK FuCKeR: YEAAHH! ARE WE NOW SAGES!?!?
wArlord: Bloody hell with ye once again there.
dArK sTuFfEr: You should respect the dignity of the situation.
DaRK FuCKeR: Sorry but I was so very excited!!
Wornas-Heikki: Dignity doth not matter so much, as I made the song whilst singing, and it thus lacks all magickal power.
dArK sTuFfEr: Nevertheless, a lightning stroke at the exact point when the ceremony ended.
DaRK FuCKeR: Yeah!
DaRK FuCKeR: But what should we start doin' right now?
Wornas-Heikki: Only ye can decide that! All the responsibility of the comin' times of Lietevesi is now yers.
DaRK FuCKeR: But we don't know what to do!
Wornas-Heikki: I still have some lifetime remainin'. I could still tell quite many secrets to ye.
DaRK FuCKeR: Yeahh!! Tell tell tell!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: For the cunt's sake, behave now there -
Wornas-Heikki: Boys, do not summon the cunt for no purpose, as the cunt is a powerful one!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Sorry...
wArlord: We could like start from the beginnin'. What was there in Lietevesi afore the Sage School?
Wornas-Heikki: The Giants were the first here, and then were the Lapps... but they always merely stayed here for a short while.
Wornas-Heikki: The first dwellers who kept stayin' were the ones who wanted to hide from their foes. 'Twas over a thousand years ago.
Wornas-Heikki: Lietevesi is at the upper edge of the waters, one cannot get any further by boat. Also, the brook that leads here is well hidden.
Wornas-Heikki: Sometimes, when there were hard times of war, the dwellers even dried the brook, so nobody from the south could find here...
...
Wornas-Heikki: They never even dared to visit the north side of the lake, they were so 'frad of the witches. It was all the same wrong end to them.
Wornas-Heikki: So, when the crownmen came to write down the names of the villages in the north, the only name they gave 'em was Wrong-end.
Wornas-Heikki: In truth, there be three villages here: Hiienkylä, Ketsu and Poronsuo. But the Crown maps say Pirunkylä instead of Hiienkylä...
...
Wornas-Heikki: The Könönen family always wanted to know how the foreign gentlemens' things worked.
Wornas-Heikki: For many generations, they took apart clocks and locks, and learned to make the same kind of things by theirselves.
Wornas-Heikki: There was a boy of my age in the town, Lauri Könönen, who built his own steam engine when he was merely fifteen...
...
Wornas-Heikki: Yer fates be all chained to Lietevesi now. No matter where ye go, Lietevesi shalt call ye all back.
Wornas-Heikki: It may take tens of years, but ye shall all dwell here when ye be old, each one of ye.
Wornas-Heikki: I have seen some of the world too. I was on the road for twenty years even without once coming back to Lietevesi.
Wornas-Heikki: I visited many places of Lapland, many sages there... I also saw the cities: Helsinki, Viipuri, Turku, Tallinn, St.Petersburg...
Wornas-Heikki: I also was in many professions: servant of blacksmith, quackslaver, bookbinder, postman, travellin' teacher ...
...
Wornas-Heikki: Lönnrot put it all wrong in his book. Where all began was not the first ocean but the first forest.
Wornas-Heikki: The first forest was never without form and void, but it hath all the possible lingonberries and other berries ye can reckon of.
Wornas-Heikki: Thus, from the berries of the first forest came all possible first-oceans, waterbirds, väinämöinens, poems and world-eggs.
Wornas-Heikki: The first forest lies so deep down that one needs to stop many times when goin' there, to beg for new spirits and drums...
...
Wornas-Heikki: We never wrote in vain, so our memory kept strong. If one wanted to support their memory, they merely wrote down the first letters.
Wornas-Heikki: When we sent out birch-bark messages, we always used a secret writin' that looked like the usual bark pattern.
Wornas-Heikki: When we got such messages ourselves, we then counted the strokes to match 'em with the knots of the Onnimanni poem...
...
Wornas-Heikki: We never wished to become like Kalle Pöksyläinen from the town, whose life had nothing but books.
Wornas-Heikki: He'd never gone to schools, even confirmation school, but he had somehow learned to read and then started to collect books.
Wornas-Heikki: Kalle's son Eero went to Sage School for a while, but he could do nothing, as the books were all there was for him.
Wornas-Heikki: So, if one has a good knowledge, there should also be a good skill. The best sages have always been good smiths.
Wornas-Heikki: Even Turku-Martti was not a mere book-knower, as he could make good lenses from glass, and he also taught the skill to others...
...
Wornas-Heikki: I merely wish to say to ye now: never narrow yerselves down! If ye wish to travel the world, then do travel.
Wornas-Heikki: Never lock yerselves to one way of living and being, but try out all of 'em.
Wornas-Heikki: No way is better than another, even if it were one liked by evil-doers and foes.
Wornas-Heikki: Even in the Sage School we were just as zealful to learn about the foreign and churchly teachings as the ones of our own.
Wornas-Heikki: But what is important that the learnings are received in a suitable way instead of always the way given by the noblemen...
...
Wornas-Heikki: In Saint Petersburg, there was a Finnish widow called Helena, who did spiritism and mesmerism.
Wornas-Heikki: Once, I visited her for mesmerism -
DaRK FuCKeR: HEY DOODZ, LOOK AT THAT DOOR!!
wArlord: Fuck's sake, there's a fire runnin' wild in the other room!!
Wornas-Heikki: So, it is now time.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Getta fuck outta here, quick!
wArlord: May I help mister Sage outta here -
Wornas-Heikki: I shall stay!
wArlord: Please, come on -
Wornas-Heikki: Get out already, save yerselves!
wArlord: Allrighty...
...
wArlord: Bloody hell, he knew for real that there'd be a fire comin', and he never warned us aboot it!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Right... for da FUCK'S SAKE DAMMIT I was afraid, even more than back in Öökkölä!!
DaRK FuCKeR: HEY DOODZ LOOK, A FLYIN' SAUCER!!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Indeed. Extremely peculiar.
wArlord: Bloody hell...
dArK sTuFfEr: The UFO apparently abducted Vornas-Heikki. This is good thing, as no one shall find his body in the ruin in that case.
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Maybe we should get the fuck outta here anyway, before the cops and others come and suspect us of the fire.
myXTer: Yeah, we should absolutely get back home right now!
wArlord: Might be a good idea.
dArK sTuFfEr: Nevertheless, I found the night very interesting and Vornanen's stories extremely enlightening.
DaRK FuCKeR: Yeah, right!! AND BESIDES, WE'RE NOW THE CHAMPIONSHIP SAGES OF LIETEVESI, YEAAHHH!!!
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