««- · CWU MEMOiRS 0x29 · -»»
========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x2A =========
DaTE: 1995-03-06 aT aBoUT 08:55
LoCATi0N: kÄyTäVÄ, LiETeVeDeN yLÄaSTE, LiEtEvEdEN KiRkOnKYLä, FiNLAND
PrESeNT: mR.mEgAsTuFf
dA dArK WaNKeR
WaRe FuCKeR
MoTHeR WaNKeR
dArK sTuFfEr
WoRLD HeR0aND aLSo sOmE SiSSyWISSy-LAmErS fROm 7A iNClUDING: MIKKO "The SkeneMies" KALLIO, JANI, JANETZU, MERJA
aND aLSO oUR tEAChER: KERTTU "KURPPANAAMA" KORHONEN
===========================================================================
MIKKO: So, now the Hautataipale bus came!
JANETZU: You'll hafta tell us ALL OF IT!!! There's been some mindless gossips...
MIKKO: Are them there gossips true? That y'all had been chased by the cops...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, I run away from my home and hided in a secret hiding place none of yar kinda sissies will ever get to know 'bout!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I hided there for 'bout three days, and some of my partners-in-crime brought me some food there to save me from starvin'!
MIKKO: I heard there were fuckin' many days of police search!!! With bloodhounds and everthang!!!
MIKKO: Some scent supposedly lead here to the school and they even came inside to look!!!
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, we were hiding in the school area at a point but luckily we noted JUST IN TIME that there's a fuckin' police patrol comin' and we then run away to our fuckin' secret headquarters...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: During those days we got da kinda secret criminal trainin' we can use to completely surpass town sissies and keep a hold of the sceptre of the whole Lietevesi underground!
WaRe FuCKeR: WHY DINNA Y'ALL TELL ME AFOREHAND? SO UNFAIR!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: We won't fuckin' tell nuffin' to such a megarat! We don't trust in any of yar betrayals...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I heard ya fuckin' tattler had told da cops that we'd supposed to be hiding somewhere in Vääräpää, so we predicted this just right!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Luckily we realized to change da place!!
WaRe FuCKeR: Well, THEY FORCED ME!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: They fuckin' didn't... if they'd been holding a loaded pistol at yar temple ya could talk about forcin'!
dArK sTuFfEr: Yeah, it ain't forcin' if they torture ye in ways that yer life's not in danger...
WaRe FuCKeR: They dinna actually -
dArK sTuFfEr: SO, SOME OF US ARE WEAKER THAN THE OTHERS... but luckily we're now getting that there tuffness training so the weaker ones can also become toughies...
MERJA: I heard that once they dinna find y'all with them bloodhounds they called in VORNAS-HEIKKI to find y'all with a dowsin' rod...
MIKKO: Whatta hell?
JANETZU: RIGHT ON THEN, y'all gotta have been hidin' quite well if it takes Vornas-Heikki to find y'all...
MIKKO: Dinna that gaffer die like years ago?
dA dArK WaNKeR: There starts a gossip every now and then that he had died, but no, he still struggles on...
dArK sTuFfEr: How old's he anyway? Like a hundred years?
dA dArK WaNKeR: I guess nobody really knows...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And they were actually just lookin' for me...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: 'Coz I've been havin' some quarrel with Reijo who wants to force me into his family.
JANETZU: Gotta be hard if ye hafta run from yer home like that!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, 'twas great when there was d cop van in da yard and then there's some Vornas-Heikki pushing in and da cops all hard-on behind him...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And once they'd been chasin' us for hours in da woods they finally got us to the van for questionin'...
dArK sTuFfEr: They also kept me in the van for some time, and that there Sam too... and then our legal-aged crime partners...
WoRLD HeR0: But pHASERhAWK isn't -
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Shh!
dArK sTuFfEr: Mega then had to leave in the police van towards Tahkovuori...
MIKKO: What an incredible story!!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah. And in Tahko, once da cops had left, Reijo took me into da hut angry as hell and fuckin' took a helluva whip forward...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: I mean it's one of an experience when da ass is hurtin' like hell and then ONE FUCKIN' SYPHILIS-DICKED NAZI CRETIN forces me to fuckin' ski down some fuckin' lousy hill day after day!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: And to smile in some "family photos" with which he wants to prove to himself and others that we're supposed to have some fuckin' family idyll goddammit!!!
JANETZU: I mean that's so fuckin' crazy!!! I heard Sari'd been hidin' too...
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, but they found Sari before me... and heard she also got whipped on da arse...
JANETZU: Whatta fuckin' sadist!!!
MIKKO: Have y'all been reckonin' aboot doin' some real robberies next? At least I've been plannin' with Jani...
dArK sTuFfEr: Ain't that a little bit miserable, Mikko?
MIKKO: Y'ALL THREW IN THE CHALLENGE, SO WE'VE GOTTA RESPOND TO IT!
JANI: JUST LIKE THAT! COME ON HEY!
dArK sTuFfEr: We went thru some fuckin' hard stuff in the skiing holiday and then y'all reckon we had voluntarily taken it for competing against y'all!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, FOR DA FUXX SAKE we wouldn't be any less interested in yar childish challenges and contests!!
mR.mEgAsTuFf: We've now seen WHAT LIFE TASTES LIKE and we really don't want yar childsh clownings...
MIKKO: BLOODY HELL DAMMIT, SO Y'ALL ENDIN' THE GAME RIGHT AWAY WHEN YAR WINNIN'!!!
JANI: We won't let y'all run off like that! YE HAFTA FINISH THE CONTEST YE STARTED!
MIKKO: JUST LIKE THAT!
MIKKO: WE'RE GONNA ARM OURSELVES WITH SUCH WEAPONRY THAT EVEN THE COPS WON'T DARE TO TOUCH US!!
MIKKO: AND PLAN THE KINDA ROBBERY GIGS THAT LIETEVESI HAS NEVER SEEN SUCH AFORE!! WE'LL BE ROBBIN' BANKS AND PASSERS-BY LIKE HELL...
MIKKO: THE WHOLE BACKWARDS SAVONIA WILL BE FEARIN' OUR CRIMINAL GANG!
MIKKO: AND WE'LL BE SO TUFF THAT WE'LL BE GETTIN' LAID JUST BY SNAPPIN' OUR FINGESS!!! AND THIS WILL BE TRUE!!!
KERTTU-OPE: MIKKO!!! GET TO THE HEADMASTER'S OFFICE, NOW!!!
MIKKO: Nawwww, fuckin' teacher came...
KERTTU-OPE: YOU SAID WHAT TEACHER???
MIKKO: Sorree sorree sorree, don't give me any attention, pleeze pleeze pleeze...
KERTTU-OPE: And no respect even for one's mother tongue, repeating English-language words like that...
KERTTU-OPE: I think I should lower your grade right away...
MIKKO: Nawww!!!
KERTTU-OPE: Do you call that walking to the headmaster's office?
MIKKO: Sorree sorree, I'm just takin' my bag and then leave...
JANETZU: (Tee-hee, what a sissy...)
KERTTU-OPE: There hasn't been anything praiseworthy in the actions of the rest of you either!
KERTTU-OPE: Let us now get to the classroom, and I shall give you a form mistress lesson where we discuss how to deal with the police and the society.
KERTTU-OPE: Mikko will hopefully get a private lesson straight from the headmaster.
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