C00LeS WaReZ UNiON MeMOiRS: cHApTER #0x7D

========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x7D =========

DaTE:     1996-09-16 aT 17:56

LoCATi0N: mR.mEgAsTuFf's hOmE, hAuTaTAiPALe, LiETEVESi, FiNLanD

PrESeNT:  wArlord. mR.mEgAsTuFf. dArK sTuFfeR. DaRK FuCKeR. myXter.
          LaMER SeCTiON: RITU, TERTTU, PENTTI & some others later!!!

===========================================================================

RITU: Do take some cake, boys! As y'all sit here for the last time for Mika's birthday party...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Right, I really ain't plannin' to have birthday parties here anymore once I've moved to Helsinki!

TERTTU: My god, y'all boys are gonna live in the big world next year, walkin' the worldly paths!! Our tiny birdies!!

wArlord: But the cake's already changed for sump'n else already! As the Jauhiainens quit their bakery and moved to Kuopio...

TERTTU: I'm sure that Pielavesians can't bake nearly as good cakes as Lietevesians!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Bloody hell dammit, why couldn't he fuckin' stay at home AT LEAST ON MY BIRTHDAY?!?

RITU: Well, as ye dinna wanna naw gift this year, Hannu decided to bring a common gift for our whole family...

DaRK FuCKeR: This tastes a lot better than Jauhiainen's cake, 'cause it's got much more sugar and everthang!!

dArK sTuFfEr: I think the cake is so overly sugary that it reminds me of American hypercommercial soap operas.

wArlord: Might be a bit like that, yeah, we're losin' all of our traditions and gettin' the same yankee shit everwhere instead...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, it could've much rather been Hannu Alarastas!! That Berglund man annoys me more than his kids together!!

DaRK FuCKeR: Where have ye been, 'cause ye don't know that Ritua and Berglund have a relationship now??

wArlord: Wonder what's Berglund bought for y'all? I take it ain't some computer or anythang?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, I'm quite fuckin' sure that he's soon gonna rush in from the door with some fuckin' multimedia Pentium...

dArK sTuFfEr: I consider this kind of use for monetary capital nauseatingly repulsive.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: And fuck's sake, he's got da kids with him!! Now, quick upstairs with da cake slices!!

RITU: Y'all not gonna take the cake upstairs, y'all would just make mess there!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY FUCKIN' PRESENT, ESPECIALLY NO FUCKIN' MULTIMEDIA PENTIUM, DAMMIT!!

RITU: Y'all could still stay, 'cause y'all know sump'n aboot computers so y'all could say -

BERGLUND: Today's not for sulking! Especially now that your family is getting a real powerhorse, the dream of all young computer enthusiasts!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: FUCK it ain't my dream, that kinda total-moron brand-name Pentium bought from da milk shop!

MIKAEL: I'm sure the tone in your bell's gonna change once you see what A TRUE WINDOWS 95 PENTIUM is capable of!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: IT FUCKIN' AIN'T! AND WHATTA FUCK ARE YA DOIN' AT MY BIRTHDAY DAMMIT???

BERGLUND: It is easier to carry the computer parts when you have several pairs of hands!

RITU: But do put the parts on that table for a while, and come to eat pieces of cake...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: YES, I DID!!! AT LEAST MORE THAN DA PISSBASTARDS THERE WOULD LIKE!!!

BERGLUND: The way's like so, that every family that follows it times nowadays has a PC micro and the applicable Internet connection!

TERTTU: We too bought a kinda new Internet computer to Kassu just a few weeks ago!

BERGLUND: But have you already tried yourself what's it like to surf on the information superhighway?

TERTTU: Naw, I ain't yet, 'cause I dunno know nuffin' aboot that... maybe Pentti could try it out firstly?

BERGLUND: The times are gone when computers were primarily bought for the kids! Nowadays they should be used by the entire family!

HENCCA: But could we install that here like now already? I'd like to see what that fixed Internet of yours looks with a good computer!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Then get to da fuckin computer classroom there with yar shitty Pentium, dammit!!

wArlord: And y'all couldna even get to CWUnet with yer Windows. In the classroom there would be a standard coax network too...

dArK sTuFfEr: Indeed. If you want to use CWUnet here in Lahnala with your Windows PCs, you must first programa Windows driver for it.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: So, fire up yar macroassemblers and start workin' on da driver, come on, get on the job...

dArK sTuFfEr: OH7MO could give you the source code of his driver, so you would not even need to start from zero.

HENCCA: We've got WINDOWS 95!! We don't need to do nuffin' in the difficult way, with assemblers or source codes...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: If there simply AIN'T NO Windows driver for some card, ya won't get it no matter how much ya wanked at Bill Gates' photo dammit!!!

dArK sTuFfEr: Not indeed! Besides, the sigil fitness of Gates' photograph is nearly nonexistant in the first place.

BERGLUND: Oh, so that fixed network of yours was just a hobbyist kludge. Well, luckily I also bought a real, professional Internet connection.

BERGLUND: KotiKolumbus from Finnet has a perfectly competitive consumer price. 20 pennies per minute -

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Right, I guessed it was some shit like that! Even more expensive than fuckin' Telesampo we luckily don't need to use anymore, ever!

wArlord: Yeah. Picture Planet would've ended up a lot cheaper, it's just the monthly fee and the local phone fee -

BERGLUND: Well, I ignored the hobbyist kludges when I was comparing the consumer prices. There should be some kind of quality assurance!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Could anything be lamer than this... comin' to a house that's got a fixed Internet and then TWIDDLE 'ROUND WITH SOME MISERABLE DIALUP!!!

HENCCA: Well, dialup or not, at least we've got proper browser instead of any text-based Lynx shit!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: YA FUCKIN' AIN'T GOT NO CLUE OF NUFFIN'!! I'M GONNA GET UPSTAIRS RIGHT NOW!!!

TERTTU: Oh my goodness, with the manners!! I hope mister Berglund didn't get mad...

BERGLUND: No, I didn't! I've seen some youngsters even in my own family, heh heh...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I guess ya got da time to look at it, I'm sure da lamerclowns take many hours to install it...

wArlord: Yeah. And we could chat aboot sump'n else in the meantime, like how's our party plans progressin'.

wArlord: Well, it's a bit hard to change it anymaw, now that the invitation started spreadin' afore we noticed the blunder...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, let's release a new invitation then, dammit! Besides, the text invitation was even nuked from cdrom.com for not bein' executable..

wArlord: Well, right, maybe if we released an invitation intro, it would surely stay there and be better than the text.

dArK sTuFfEr: The chiptunes not used in other demos can be freely used in the invitation intro.

dArK sTuFfEr: On the other hand, we could also release the intro under the name of Silent Mulats, which would allow us to use blerp music as well.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fuck's sake, didn't ya make da fuckin' fakecrew just for gettin' more organizer crews for da party?

dArK sTuFfEr: Because of that it would be good to show the world that the crew in question has made something for our party.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I'm not gettin' yar strategy at all now... foundin' some separate crews JUST for all kinda useless trickery!!

dArK sTuFfEr: I think the current consensus strategy of CWU pose too much restrictions on what we can do under the crew.

wArlord: Yeah, well, I've also got that JGA I've used to release the tradition text that I've heard ain't suitable for CWU quality...

DaRK FuCKeR: And I also founded ZGS 'cause I reckoned I might wanna release some Doom levels with it...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Okay, I get da point if ya got some releases that are too lame for CWU, but Silent Mulats ain't got nuffin' like that!!

dArK sTuFfEr: We have been using the name to continue the occult activity we started under cHAOS wORLD uNKNOWN.

dArK sTuFfEr: You shall not need to worry of that. Silent Mulats have an excellent level of data security. Even most DECREPiTUDE users are unaware of it.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, most DECREPiTUDE users are from our school's computer classroom nowadays, I think -

dArK sTuFfEr: It INDEED exists, and it is still one of the most notable concentrations of TRUE occult scene in the 017 area.

wArlord: I take ye mean 97X area? It's gonna be 97X to me, even after the old area codes stop workin', dammit!

dArK sTuFfEr: To be exact, I am referring to the Northern Savonian telecommunications zone.

wArlord: Well, right, I get it that ye wanna be sure that nobody accidentally counts the Karelian 97X in...

wArlord: But ye could still call it 97X to have some respect for the local traditions!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: But fuck's sake, how d'ya STAND that yar Linux is bein' used for some DEEP MORONS from our school's computer classroom!?

dArK sTuFfEr: Quite well, actually. The feeling of power is exciting, and I am particularly excited when girls use my system.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fuck's sake, ya actually get a hard-on when some girls log on to yar Linux!!

dArK sTuFfEr: The feeling can be compared to the idea that Sanna, Elina, Oona and Milla actually arrived to my bedroom live.

dArK sTuFfEr: I suspect that the presence of fruitful ninth-graders would excite Vihtori as well, as, after all, he is also in puberty.

wArlord: Well, I don't reckon they're usin' it a lot anymaw, once they got to make Freenet accounts for themselves...

dArK sTuFfEr: No, apart from Oona, for whom I made a user account of her own, in order to prevent the Quake boys' "kill" attempts from being effective.

dArK sTuFfEr: This was part of my pedagogical strategy to begin with. The possibility to tease other users motivates to learn Unix.

dArK sTuFfEr: At least that kind of motivators are extremely effective to myself.

myXTer: I guess the seventh-graders haven't yet found the script that lets you kill Freenet users...?

dArK sTuFfEr: No, according to the TCP log data I have gathered. But I am already counting days to when it happens.

myXTer: Well, once that happens, I'm sure I can persuade the girls to make user accounts to my Linux!

dArK sTuFfEr: You can freely take the other girls as your users, I am fine with Oona. At least for now.

dArK sTuFfEr: The emotions I have on Oona have a completely rational basis, so the size of her breasts is not a factor in them.

wArlord: So, y'all have already expanded the CWUnet to Korppinen, as yer tawkin' aboot Sam's Linux?

DaRK FuCKeR: You have all the required hardware and software for your own Unix shell server. Just make it.

DaRK FuCKeR: But I've still gotta keep up DaRK MuRDER on DOS at the same time!! As there's STILL no Linux version of BBBS yet -

dArK sTuFfEr: But you have two computesr. You can well dedicate one of them for DOS and the other for Linux.

DaRK FuCKeR: I'd rather keep the monitor in my 486 and leave the 286 without one!!

dArK sTuFfEr: Well, in that case you can probably buy a monochrome monitor for your 286. They are actually quite cheap nowadays -

DaRK FuCKeR: I ain't got naw money for that anymaw!! Besides, I also wanna play games with the 486...

dArK sTuFfEr: I sincerely hope that your lust for games would cease soon, or you at least concentrated on the Unix-compatible games such as roguelikes and MUDs.

DaRK FuCKeR: I don't reckon it's gonna cease nowhere! Games rule, or graphical games I mean!!!

myXTer: I'm still not likin' it at all, that you renamed EMPTYNESS to DaRK MuRDER...

myXTer: I think the dismemberment murder is too short time ago to let us joke about it like that...

wArlord: Yeah, I also reckon it's quite gross at this point, it's a disgrace to Marko's memory...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yar a fuckin' bunch of MISSIES, limitin' yar sense of humor like that!! I'm sure Makaron would've been pissed off by yar missiness!!

wArlord: Well, I reckon I'd be more pissed off if y'all dinna take my death seriously...

dArK sTuFfEr: You have no power over what we do under the name of Silent Mulats -

wArlord: Well, I FUCKIN' SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND y'all to STOP makin' jokes aboot that dismemberment murder, at least for now!!

myXTer: I'm not as concerned about the murder as the possibility that cops get a clue that we might have something to do with it!!

wArlord: Well, yeah, right, that's a point here too. But what aboot startin' to drink kilju?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: But I've also been pissed off da fact that all da proper BBS soft is for DOS and all da proper Internet soft is for Linux...

dArK sTuFfEr: This is the reason I think we should abandon DOS and make our BBSes Unix-based.

dArK sTuFfEr: I suppose we have already discussed the phenomenon of BBS and Internet worlds repelling one another.

dArK sTuFfEr: I think the Internet world is technically superior to BBSes in all areas, so we should prefer it.

wArlord: Ye actually mean so? Well, for starters, all the essential PC boardsoft is for DOS and OS/2 -

dArK sTuFfEr: The Unix environment is also superior when used in the manner of a BBS software.

wArlord: Right, and most folks don't even know how to use it! Then, if ye make messages areas with the newsgroup tech, you lose the TO fields...

wArlord: The hell it is! It's easier to notice the replies yer messages got if ye've got the TO field...

dArK sTuFfEr: Newsgroups apply a different way of thinking. In proper reader software, threads can be tagged for subsequent following -

wArlord: Yeah, right, again some Internet hardships ye need to separately learn! At least BBS software makes everthang easy -

dArK sTuFfEr: If you consider easiness that important, shouldn't you then rather advocate WWW than BBSes...?

wArlord: There's all the same Internet hardships with WWW also, they've just hidden 'em under them flashy graphics!

wArlord: In BBSes and DOS everthang is much clearer, for real... It's mostly one thang takin' place at a time there.

dArK sTuFfEr: Maybe BBSes are suitable for the kind of people who want to remain simple instead of advancing as human beings -

wArlord: Behave there now, dammit! That's gotta be the stupidest excuse ever for the unnecessary complexities of the Internet!!

dArK sTuFfEr: But regardless of your opinion, I think at least Frontline BBS should transition to a Unix server.

dArK sTuFfEr: 286 is perfectly sufficient for BBS use, but a WHQ computer should absolutely be a proper Unix server, that is, at least a 386.

dArK sTuFfEr: This is particularly relevant if we want to sell Internet access beyond mere telnet connections to Frontline users.

dArK sTuFfEr: Our blunderings in front of the computer classroom a week ago was unspeakably awkward, in my opinion, and I do not hope -

wArlord: So, 'twas some socio-economical pressure that made ye abandon yer principles?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah, ya think yar on some fuckin' highly enlightened levels above normal mortals, and then ya get embarrassed by something like that!!

dArK sTuFfEr: You have now completely misunderstood me. I have been supporting sticking to 286 in BBS use, but Unix use is a different thing -

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Fuckin' double standards, man! "All hardware upgrades are always absolutely condemnable" and bla bla...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: But if ya justify da upgrade with some Unix elitism, then ya get an instant orgasm and start buyin' some 386SX overdrive!

wArlord: Right, hell with it! And we could use the extra 386SX power even on the DOS level...

dArK sTuFfEr: I have remained completely logical to my principles. I am not supporting the running of a 16-bit operating system on a 32-bit processor.

dArK sTuFfEr: It is 32-bit, on deep Platonic levels of essence, in ways similar to the Motorola processors used in Amigas -

wArlord: But I'd now like to suggest a compromise that WE AIN'T GONNA CHANGE NUFFIN' AT FRONTLINE! DOS, PCBoard, 286, and that's it!

dArK sTuFfEr: I might agree with this. Still, I am personally planning to reduce my BBS use and concentrate on the Internet ever more intensely.

myXTer: I'm not that interested either about the BBS world and the problems of the DOS software...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: But I'm not gonna quit da boards! Da net's so fulla stupid lamers who get ever more stupid, but on boards ya can go on with da good stuff!!

DaRK FuCKeR: I also like the BBS atmosphere, even though Internet rules a damn lot too...

dArK sTuFfEr: Maybe the incompatibility between the BBS and Internet worlds means that the BBS culture cannot be losslessly transferred into the Internet.

wArlord: Yeah, we could maybe agree at that. All these useless fads will just destroy the whole culture.

wArlord: So, NO MATTER HOW THE WORLD CHANGED, FRONTLINE IS PCBOARD AND WILL STAY THAT WAY! AND I'M NOT GONNA BEND AT THAT!!