C00LeS WaReZ UNiON MeMOiRS: cHApTER #0x55

========= C00LeS WaReZ UNiON * HiSToRiCaL mEmOiRZ * cHApTeR #0x55 =========

DaTE:     1995-10-22 aT aBoUT 20:30

LoCATi0N: sOMe mOpED gANG'S hARdKorE mEETiNG pLACE, LiETeVESi KiRKoNkYLaE

PrESeNT:  mR.mEgAsTuFf / C00LeS WaReZ UNiON
          MoTHeR WaNKeR / fORMeRLY C00LeS WaREZ UNiON
          + sOme MopED gANGzTaHz

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TOMPPA: The holiday's gonna be ove tomorrow. And Tossavainen's also come back from his trip...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Yeah...

MASA: Well, didye Tossavainen get laid by that there Riia?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: IT'S NONE OF YAR FUCKIN' BUSINESS!!!

TOMPPA: Guess ye dinna.

EERO: Wonder if them witcheries of yers work for real at all?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: They fuckin' work!

TOMPPA: So, why dinna ye conjure pussy outta that girl?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: 'Coz I fuckin' went straight from Helsinki to Oulu and met that Riia there for the first time!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: There wasn't any time to make any doll or to collect her hair and glue them in it or to do the fuckin' activation ritual after that...

TOMPPA: I've also been startin' to really doubt if 'em tricks work at all.

TOMPPA: 'Cause we ain't gotten laid by Päivi even though we've wanked to that doll heapsa times over the holiday.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, I might have gotten the activation formula wrong...

SAMPPA: Well, at least in that Jaana doll that s'posed to have gone right well?

SAMPPA: And still I ain't gotten laid by Jaana even though I've wanked to it like at least ten times!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Well, maybe if it only works when I'm present at the place...

TOMPPA: I reckon a bit that ye ain't got nuffin' to give our gang if them witch-trickeries don't start workin'!

EERO: Seems yer makin' lies up from yer head aboot why they wouldna work.

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I fuckin' ain't! I've put all my effort to this service!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: Besides, I'd like to put some additional conditions for my membership 'cause of that...

TOMPPA: Well, what kinda?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: If yar bringin' Jaana or Päivi or even some fuckin' adult women here, then I MUST ALSO BE ALLOWED TO CUDDLE 'EM!!

TOMPPA: God-fuckin'-dammit, yer now bein' quite arrogant aboot yer bargains now!

TOMPPA: For starters, I'd say that 'em ritu-awls hafta work at least three times afore we reckon anythang else!

EERO: And we could also give ye the kinda condition that ya should start tawkin' Savonian afore yer even allowed to be in the gang...

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I'M GETTIN' DA FUCK OUTTA HERE IF YA DON'T APPRECIATE MY WITCHDOCTOR SKILLZ!!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I'M GONNA GET LAID MUCH EASIER BY MYSELF THAN WITH YER HELP!!!

SAMPPA: Wonder if it's quite like that at all...

TOMPPA: Would ye then get back to that there Hautataipale computer faggot gang?

mR.mEgAsTuFf: WELL, EVEN THEY MUST DO FUCKIN' SUMTHING REALLY FUCKIN' UNBELIEVABLE TO GET ME BACK!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I'M A FUCKIN' INDEPENDENT INDIVIDUAL AND NO FUCKIN' SHEEP DAMMIT!!!

TOMPPA: I reckon we've heard ye quite enough already.

EERO: What aboot if ye quit the whine and get outta here afore Jaana comes here.

TOMPPA: Yeah, ye better start to get the hell outta here now.

TOMPPA: YE AIN'T GOT NUFFIN' TO DO WITH OUR GANG ANYMAW, YE FUCKIN' CLOWN!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: YA DOODZ BELIEVED FOR REAL WHEN I PRENTENDED TO BE A WITCHDOCTOR, AND THEN YA CALL ME A CLOWN!!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: BWAHAHAH, WHATTA BUNCHA LAMOS!

mR.mEgAsTuFf: I REALLY AIN'T GONNA MISS YER COMPANY!!! GOODBYE!!!